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im your everyday nonsensical, stitch loving, stupidly annoying girl who judges you.






Bituwin - template
Dementee - image

Words from Before It's Too Late by Goo Goo Dolls.

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

The Karate Kid yesterday night at GV Yishun.

It is a good show with a good combination of laughter, tears and excitement.


Lunch with Jenny and Fang at Waraku @Central .

Over ate again, too full now. just want to sleep quite badly...

Monday, June 28, 2010

Its been 4 days since Rainbow's passing. And i am still not over it.
Some times i think to myself, how nice if the feeling i am feeling is out of guilt of not being nicer to her. But i know that none of my emotions are based on guilt, and that's what makes me more upset. Cause i genuinely loved her and treated her well.

I still feel like crying each time i close my eyes and see her face. I still feel like calling her back.

Each time im on the bike, i look into the sky and try to find her amongst the cloud. but each time i reach my destination with disappointment.

I really want to bring her home. But the discussion for her urn placement have caused a stir in our family.
I miss her. and when i saw the short video of her, i almost wanted to burst out crying. Although the video had nothing special, just had her sitting on the chair, looking around, it brought back many memories.

Im not sure when can i accept the fact and when can i go over to my aunt's house again. I dont think its too soon, but i hope its not long. Because Phoenix will be alone and neglected.


Sigh.

Friday, June 25, 2010
In Memory of Rainbow

I've had pets that passed away before. But their deaths didnt hurt as much as Rainbow's.

I still remember the day we met Rainbow. It was one Saturday night when Andy, Sis, Sis's BF and I went over for dinner and we saw a tiny dog. It was also coincidentally that Phoenix went for grooming and came back with scratches. We all blamed Rainbow. She was so scared that she hid in the toilet. Only after our cousin told us that it was the groomers fault that we realized we've maligned Rainbow.
I took a tiny piece of treat and went to the toilet to give it to her. She cautiously smelled me and took the treats from my hand. Once she has gobbled the treat, she jumped right into my lap and we became best friends.
She was the sweetest thing i've ever met. Everytime we go over to my aunt's hse for dinner, she'd run right to the door and start barking like saying Hello! And as soon as i sit down, she'd jump onto my lap and whine and whine. She wouldnt let Phoenix come near me. And if i were to stroke Phoenix, she'd run to me and give me the 'puss in boots' eyes.
Whenever we're having dinner, she'll sit beside me and wait for my food to drop. if i didnt 'accidentally' drop anything, she'd stand on her hind legs and use her paws to poke me.

After dinner, we'll be on the couch, and without permission, she'll just jump right next to us.

I remember bringing her to my house for sleepovers. And i'll miss how she sleep in my arms.

I remember bringing her out for night cycling. and i'll miss her curiousity.

I remember how she loves getting the attention, even when non of us want to attend to her.

I remember her tiny tennis ball. and i'll miss her bringing the ball to me.

I remember how excited she is whenever we hold her ball.

I remember how she wait near the cup board cause her ball is stuck under the cupboard.

I remember how she'd jump onto me, as soon as i lie down.

I remember how she'd just sit beside me when im doing my work.

Her fur colour is black and white. But Rainbow, the name is based on her personality.

I went to see her for the last time yesterday. Cold, and hard. My heart ached. seeing her lying there, it just looked like she's sleeping. but no matter how i called for her, she didnt open her eyes and look at me.
I saw her cute ears, bright eyes, tiny paws, all not moving anymore. I cant believe. I dont want to believe. i want to hold her in my arms so bad. but she wouldnt jump.

Its Rainbow the one that brightened up the place, puts a smile on everyone's faces.

Usually on a weekday, i wouldnt miss her as much as i miss her now, but i'd look forward to seeing her again on Saturdays.
But today, i miss her more than anyone or anything else in this world.

Im having a hard time trying to keep my tears in. I smile and i laugh. But in my heart, i really want to cry out loud.


And i realized, i never told Rainbow that i love her.


Rainbow, sorry its late, but I love you.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Alone in the office, making up for the hours I took to go see Rainbow for one last time.




there's so much i wanna say.

but all that i can mumble out now is

I LOVE YOU

Rest in peace my dear Rainbow, for no other can replace you in our heart.

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

hai.

Savings plans are ways to cheat people of their money.

My BF signed up with Manulife via UOB in 2006. i remember very clearly, we were shown a table of the cash value if the policy were to be terminated.

its been 4 years we have been paying w/o fail each month, and from the table, we should be seeing 14k. and 25 years later, we should be looking at 50k.

Today we called to ask Manulife if we could terminated the policy and get the cash value for our wedding. He calculated and said 'your cash value is 800+'

WTF.

So i made him calculate the cash value after 25 years. and after holding the line for so long, he told me, 'it will be around 22k'

WTF.

end of 25 years, we are going to fork out 16k+ and to only get back 22k?! only 6k more!

this kind of savings plan always have this kind of hidden terms. fuck. pui.
its this kind of fucking experience that makes my blood boil. you knw the cheated feeling?

FUCK MANULIFE AND FUCK UOB.

Manulife is at fault too. Because they didnt train their UOB staff well enough.

Now how? continue to fucking plan lah.

and cannot get married.

this, i blame manulife.



PISSED OFF MAXIMUM.

Friday, June 18, 2010

Lunch time was spend talking.

From marriage to pregnancy to delivery to having a kid to mahjong to gambling to drinking to stupid friends who is cheapskate to going overseas to chinese new year to parents who nag to filial piety to cousins who are unfilial to siblings who are unfilial to animals to
My infamous life story

Everyone has their own family problems. But its those problems who makes us stronger and makes us a better person.
Its because we have suffered that we have become what we are today.

Those spoilt kids should go through half of what i've been through and soon they will appreciate whatever they are having.

ok, back to work. baahh....

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Another post for the day.
I've never actually ranted this out before because i thought that it really should be none of my business but, my sister gave me permission to share this story, also hoping this will inspire my BFF.
WARNING. alot of vulgarity ahead. (And maybe some biasness)
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my sister and this fucker has been together for 5 years plus. my sister did so much for him, even styled him to look nicer and more presentable. but what has the fucker done for my sister? just buy lots of different games stuff and give to my sis, but its so that he can play it too. CHEAPO.
5 years and no marriage plans? Knew smth would go wrong.
My sister went to a malaysia trip and came back finding movie tickets to some atas cinema. (CHEAP to my sister, not cheap to other girls. what an ass)
so she asked him about it. and he said :
"There is nothing going on... Nothing between the two of us... I needed to buy a new phone and headphone becoz mine's spoiled already... So i asked her to go with me... Thats my only off day and i need that phone urgently... You are not around wat... Anyway, The show is I want to watch one... It's an anime show... I'm calling to tell you don't think of stupid things... There is nothing between us..."
So my sister called me and told me about it. I called that fella of course. i was very calm. i said
"Dont lie to me. u tell me now, is there a 3rd party?'
He kept insisting that there isnt.

BUT
there's this SLUT involved.
(the best thing for their scandal is, their work place is just opposite each other!)

What a liar right? i gave him a chance to tell me the truth before i find out. and this is what pissed me off.

The SLUT is a slutty OLD woman, with one child and HAS A BOYFRIEND.
my sister's bf cheat on her and this slut cheat on her own bf.

my sister is baffled. in what way she's not better compared to that bitch?

I would say my sister lost in the following :

-sis dont know how to be a bitch
-sis dont know how to gain sympathy
-sis doesnt have a kid
-sis doesnt know how to ACT CUTE
-sis's not a SLUT.
-sis's too guai
-sis's TOO NICE


too bad sis, the final score,
SLUT : YOU
5 : 2

YOU LOSE.

I saw that girl. its not like she's a 'to-die-for' kinda girl

- NOT hot (in any fucking way. dont understand why guys wanna fuck her?)
- so old already still tie 2 ponytails to act cute
- not sexy
- short
- no boobs
- fucking UGLY.
- worst, she has a kid. 2nd hand goods also want?! wa lau eh.

(my sis first hand dont want, want second hand. old, dirty, spoilt, and cheap)

not that my sister is sibeh chio that kind, but at least my sister is pleasant to look at.

but anyway, that guy also sibeh ugly. face is chuiz one.

ok, but the main point is, MY SISTER IS STRONG

pui to the bastard and the bitch, because now my sis is damn happily in love with her real MR RIGHT.

She had to go through alot before she managed to pick herself up. From being homeless to facing the wrath of families.

She's strong. (so TAKE THAT! JERK)



p/s : the slut and the blind man is currently ENGAGED.

what a joke. i'll be laughing the LOUDEST when they break off. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
opps, laughed a bit early... hehe


Updated:
After thinking for a night, i wanna thank that SLUT. Thanks for taking away the ugly jerk off my sister's hand and make him your burden. If you never came into the picture, my sister wouldnt be happy right now. maybe still be MISERABLE with that bastard.

=D


Oh yea,

its my dearest BF and my 57th month-niversary today.

=D

it was 4 years and 9 months ago's today that was the special day, a day i would never forget and
a day i would never regret.

Happy 4 years and 9 months my dearest ANDY.

I Love you and thank you for everything that you have done for me.
i may act stupid and make you angry but its your never ending patience and love for me that affirms, no matter how stupid i may act or how angry you may get, our love is real.

that's whats most important.

you're what most important to me right now.

Thanks.


This is for a friend of mine. I hope it can inspire her to be strong again and to have faith in love.

I've had quite a number of boyfriends. but i have only truly loved 3 guys in my past. obviously 2 of them hurt me badly and because of them i'm happily attached.

My first love was in Secondary 2 (AES). (some of you may thing that im too young to know what is love, but heck, i loved and i loved hard. obviously, i fell hard too). I was class mate with him for 1 year plus, only that one fine day smth hit me and i realised that i had this feeling for him. I waited for 8 months before i actually confessed. I liked him for 8 months. that i remember clearly. i tried to get close to him, being his good friend. but it seems to be that he was wooing one of my good friend. I was upset, i was angry, but i didnt show it. after 8 long months of seeing him flirt around with other girls etc, i broke down and confessed. So, he returned his feelings and we both got together. It was tough, i was trying to impress him, and his elder sister was in the same school as we were, (makes it even harder). we were like this cute couple who seats together in class etc etc.
Then i was in this school talent show where i totally humiliated myself, and he couldnt stand me and wanted to break off with me. i remember, we met at CCK, he told me it was over and he left. i took the bus home myself and i was crying at the back seat. the last seat. i was crying so hard, everyone's looking at me.
i kinda literally begged him to take me back. so he gave me another chance and we started all over. it was all good and the holidays came. I had to move house to Yishun, but i was so willing to go to school at bukit timah just to be with him. My dad and sister wanted me to transfer school. but i refused to. i wanted to still be in the same school with him.
i invited him up to my new home, and we'd watch DVDs.
and suddenly one fine day, he broke up with me. i was so fucked up that period of time. to be honest, i was soooooo heartbroken, my mind has automatically blocked out all memories from the day he broke up with me.
i had no idea why, i had no idea where, how, when. i only vaguely remember that it was around the december holidays.
and because i had no face to face him, so i demanded to transfer school.
I still had to go back to my old school for about 2 weeks? and i heard that he is chasing another girl. woah i was so emotionally unstable that i wanted to die. LITERALLY.
up to today, i have NO memories of my 1-2 weeks in my old school, NO memories of him breaking up with me. Its like a missing piece between december to january. (i was even in a class photo that i have no idea i took)

so i've transferred. i was still hurting. but of cause i act like nothing has ever happened. that's where i met my current BFFs.

2nd love. was from NSS. I think i was in the end of secondary 3?? i got to knw this guy who was in trouble. and seeked my help. but unfortunately his case didnt go well. i remember that i have skipped school and stayed at my friend's house until it was nearer to the time of the hearing. i took his dad's cab to the court and was shaking when i was seated there. As soon as i see him, my tears started flowing. it was a room filled with emotions. his family is there, his sister is crying, i was crying, his dad is keeping his tears in. His friends were all waiting outside. i remember the tension in the room, when the judge passed out his sentence, woah mixed feeling, anger, sadness, frustration etc. mostly anger at the judge and the person who caused him to be there. i burst into tears as soon as he stood up. i could feel the pain in my heart. the pain that was even worst when i broke up with my bf (as above) He requested to speak to his sister, and the judge approved. oooh, i was PISSED. why dont wanna speak to me! i tot he was playing me luh. i went out of the court and CRIED like mad women. u can ask all his friends. how was my emotions and expressions that day.
i went back and continued crying. and for the next few days my eyes were still swollen and red. Fang was the one who's always there for me.
i remember visiting him, with his sis, i was acting strong and all but as soon as i left the place, i was crying like mad women.
waited for him for 6 months plus, i think. and soon, the feeling seems to fade away. i didnt seem to receive his letters as much, and so i thought the fading feelings were mutual.
OH his friends and family were PISSED OFF when i said that im not gonna wait any longer. but in my mind i thought that 'i've already waited for so long, and he hurt me so much in the beginning, he owes me that much'
and so, the relationship ended.

but although the heart aches and pain, i believed everything happened for a reason.
if i never got together with my bf in AES,
he wouldnt have hurt me and i
wouldnt have transferred, and
wouldnt have known my bf in NSS, and
wouldnt get so close to Fang, and
wouldnt have knwn Fang's friend and
wouldnt be intro-ed to Andy, and
wouldnt be happy right now.

I have found my Mr Right and we are happily together for coming 5 years. This love is so special and so strong, i was happy to have gone through the broken hearts to get to this love.
And from the past i learn to appreciate my BF more and to love him with all that i have.

Everything is linked to another and that's why i strongly believe that things happens for a reason.

I hope my friend would pick herself up and have more faith, its not the end of the world. its gonna be hard, i'd know.
but you have to drop everything and start over again.

Jiayou bah, my bestie.



Chanced upon the below :


FIFA World Cup 2010 Champions - A mathematical Prediction

Here is an interesting mathematics regarding the prediction of the FIFA World Cup 2010.

1978 + 1986 = 3964
1978 WC winner = Argentina
1986 WC winner = Argentina

1974 + 1990 = 3964
1974 WC winner = Germany
1990 WC winner = Germany

1970 + 1994 = 3964
1970 WC winner = Brazil
1994 WC Winner = Brazil

1962 + 2002 = 3964
1962 WC winner = Brazil
2002 WC winner = Brazil

1954 + 2010 = 3964
1954 WC winner = Germany
2010 WC winner = ???




Really? Germany?? =DDD


Dinner last night with BFFs at Plaza Sing KFC, walked around and then Fang had ice cream at Swensens.
During ice cream time, we started talking about humanity. How humans kill other beings not for survival but for the excitement and materialistic gain.
It is shown on discovery channel times and again, how a predator kill their prey. They kill the prey with one bite at the neck. Even they know what is compassion.
I despise how human has evolved into. All the cruelty, all the suffering, all the killings.
If we kill for survival, like how we eat meat, thats alright.
But have you watched the video of animals being skinned ALIVE ?
Have you watched out people cut off the shark's fin and slit their throat, throw them back into the sea and let them drown?
Have you watched how people poison dogs to make their country more beautiful?
Have you watched how people can hold a kitten and step on their head in the next minute?

For those who thinks animals are inferior, obviously you havent watched it.

Im an animal lover. Nature lover. Earth has a balance to be maintained. But how can it be maintained with all the evolutions, all the sick people in this world, all the fucked up habits.

Whew. all my rantings are out, on to the next topic.


Watched Spain vs Switzerland match yesterday @ Harry's with dearest BF, Jenny+bf and Fang+Hubby.

Spain isnnf476290$&^8udwsj5^#$uxdisnVGYe4d528jiox&*$^&!!!!!!!!!

We were all rooting for Spain. but....... a HUGE disappointment.

FINISHED

-

1Switzerland

Switzerland

Gelson Fernandes (51')




Irritating.

Super sleepy now. and i have lots of work to do. Please let today to go smoothly easily. =D



Wednesday, June 16, 2010

i have work to do, but im just not in the mood to do any work. =(

dinner with the babes today.

Orchard having some flash floods. HAHA. no shopping~~

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

today is just not my day! i woke up at 6am this morning cuz my 'da yi ma' came. I didnt wanna go back to sleep, cuz i know i'll be super tired when its time to wake up.

so dearest bf and i went down for breakfast.

being super early, we chat and relax abit unti labout 7.50am.

den dearest send me to work. halfway started drizzling.

and den Rained HEAVILY.

I am totally drenched lor.

Top, bottom, undergarments. All drench.


Now, my tummy's aching, back's aching, cold, wet and sleepy.

URG.

Monday, June 14, 2010

Dearest bf and I finally decided on our plans. Decision is one thing, doing it is another.

Will we be able to do it?

Time to really start cutting my expenditure and start saving money for the future!


I am counting down to payday, because now im broke.




Out of breath soon if i continue in this race.

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Attended Ming Hui's wedding dinner last night with dearest bf @ Novotel. The bride looks absolutely stunning.
I brought my pro camera along. but forgot my memory card. -.- so clever lor.

today's Sunday and tomorrow is back to work. but im not utilizing my Sunday very well. I woke up at 9.30am, waiting for bf to come home from work, but he only comes back at 12pm. lunch and now he's snoring. wth.

angry uh. Its sunday~ Hello??? and im at home doing NOTHING. except blogging. and going onto facebook. I do that everyday. dont have to continue on a sunday. -.-


angry.

Friday, June 11, 2010

I woke up feeling cheery and happy, though sleepy, but still light-hearted.
While i was brushing my teeth, i looked out the window and saw a clear blue sky and told myself 'what a wonderful day'
As i walked along the corridor, i hear birds chirping, and i felt fresh and smiled.
When i reached my office, i sat down and felt ready to work.

blink blink blink and time flew by.

something happened, make me wanna cry.
go to lunch, start complaining,
come back to office, feel so sleepy.

no mood to work.
no longer the happy day i thought today would be.

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Prince of Persia last night after dinner with dearest =D (recommended by Fang)

In the fantasy adventure, Gyllenhaal will play Dastan, a young prince in sixth century Persia who must join forces with Tamina (Arterton), a feisty and exotic princess, to prevent a villainous nobleman from possessing the Sands of Time, a gift from the gods that can reverse time and allow its possessor to rule the world.
(http://persia.moviechronicles.com/2008-05/jake-gyllenhaal-cast-as-prince-arterton-as-tamina/)
I would say i enjoy the movie, but not a very memorable one. The plot was alright, the actions were alright, the graphic was alright, but the cast, hot. Though seeing Jake Gyllenhaal in spartan costume was abit weird at first, and acting like he's 20+ years old, but its still acceptable after awhile..
But i thought if the glass breaks, Armageddon would be the result?


I woke up early today. 6.45pm. I didnt sleep well last night, but am still feeling very energetic and positive. Dont know why? Maybe something good is going to happen?? =P
Im hoping! (maybe more orders!!)

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

bahhh.... problems at work.. =(

please please give me luck!!


I have a date today. hhahaa with my dearest. looking forward to it like as if im a small kid.
Movie + dinner. =D

Though im totally broke. Bought 70+bucks worth of vitamins from GNC. =/
kinda regret, but i still believe health is still more important than money.

Monday, June 7, 2010

Photoshoot yesterday was a great disappointment. Dressed up and put on my makeup and heels only to find out that there is no way to enter OCH. i went to all its entry point ok! all the ulu ulu entry points also all sealed up. totally no way to get in. i wanted to climb over the fence, but there was cameras everywhere! Massive disappointment. managed to take a few shots from the exterior. but it was no fun. =(
I was reeeeaallly looking forward to yesterday. but turns out a massive disappointment.
SIGH.



Sunday, June 6, 2010

going out going out!!! YAY. but i havent finish my work. =( have to chiong finish it soon!!

mini shoot later on.. my bff Fang wanted to be my MUA. but i dont want la. feel so paiseh to ask her to do my make up den watch me there while she does nothing. i wanted a pair shoot with her!! but i remembered that i have no car for transport. =(

OCH! looks like going to rain. scary....

Thursday, June 3, 2010

you know how it feels like to see your friends hurting inside but there's nothing you can do?
you know how it feels like to know your friend has been crying everyday but there's nothing you can say?

its worrisome, frustrating, anxious and just plain sad.

2 of my besties are heart broken. but there is nothing i can do to help mend their broken heart.
i can only pray and hope they see outside of their emotions and understand that life has to go on.

Jiayou bah you both!


Im looking forward to SUNDAY! Another mini photoshoot. =P OCH. scary uh. i keep thinking of ... erm u know what luh.



Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Dinner with dearest Jen last night. Wasnt an extravagant dinner, wasnt a chill-out session, but a very down to earth meet up. =D
Lots of talking. =))
but no pictures taken. -.-

i'll be super busy with work this few days, so not time to blog much. for your entertainment, go to my Facebook for pictures which i just uploaded yesterday.

wish me luck and give me all the energy i need to last through these few days!